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whats up my dude

SEND ME THINGS PLEASE

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The only pure version of this meme

This is what Sesame Street would have on their Instagram

(Source: , via tofyuu)

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That American feel when you see a flag at half staff and don’t know if it’s a holiday or if there’s been another shooting you haven’t heard about yet

(via boazpriestly)

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armisael:

i know everyone likes to know mystical stuff related to your birthday so did you know that you have assigned tarot cards as birth cards/arcana based upon when you were born

Death and The Emperor 💀👑

The devil and the lovers ✨✨

The Star and Strength 💪🌠󾠰󾠯󾠶󾠶󾠲󾠬󾠬󾠲󾠰󾠶󾠶

temperance & hierophant 

….Also Temperance and the Hierophant

(Eyeballs my entire life)

That is actually…kinda frighteningly accurate. 

the tower and the chariot. that’s contradictory right?

I swear to gods if this glitches and I just get two death cards…

Edit: justice and the high priestess

@thebibliosphere I got the exact same one as that, wtf? Are we meant to team up or something?

The True Good Omens casting reveals itself.

Of course we are.

(via sableu)

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the moment i learned that avril lavigne is straight was a top 10 anime betrayal i mean have you seen 2002 avril

i want to live in the timeline where avril is a long-haired sporty butch brat

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I’ve heard that you start to mimic your friends’ patterns of speech after awhile, so imagine zimbits a couple months into dating, and… well we know how bitty is about terms of endearment. so on some random afternoon jack has stopped by the haus and is helping bitty with baking. they’re having a normal conversation and then jack says something like “can you pass me that, sweetheart?”
which would be normal except this is jack zimmerman!! and bitty nearly drops a bowl of flour, turns to jack with wide eyes, and he gets this HUGE grin on his face, while jack hasn’t even realised what he’s said and stands there confused as bitty fawns over his bf calling him sweetheart

(via loofahlover)

(Source: , via scotchtapeofficial)

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No offense but in Santa Clause is Coming to Town (aka Santa’s Origin Story) young Santa be lookin kinda cute. Like if he was real and looked like that, I’d be probably be up all night on Christmas Eve, not to sound like a thot 🤔

do you take constructive criticism?

did da vinci take criticism on the fucking cistine chapel let them speeak

you know i was gonna say that the post is good but this reply had such raw power that i died as soon as i saw it. this is my ghost’s attempt to make contact from the other side

(via moonturtle6)

Threesome with Samantha Roxx, Sabrina Lewis xxx videos
Rico Strong Monster Cock Scattering Tia Cyrus in Pieces

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paper-mario-wiki:

my favorite of chowder’s 4th wall breaks (after, of course, the infamous the car wash scene)

i remember seeing this shit as a kid and immediately losing trust towards most institutions

Stop talking like this cartoon didn’t come out like, a year ago

It came out in… 2007 my dude

(Source: , via tis-litten)

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All hail pumpkin spice

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Elves deserve respect 🐉

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Garden Genie Gloves

..so I actually have a pair of these from the Greenhouse and they work fucking great?  

  • comfy, like, actually comfy, not this half-assed “it’s not totally sweaty and gross” deal I get with most gloves
  • claws mean u give good skrtiches and u will be the fave of the two huge fucking guard dogs the manager keeps on the property and nobody will bother you, ever.
  • and if the dogs aren’t there dudes don’t perv on ppl wearing claws.
  • earn the respect and fear of small children.
  • u get to pretend to be a marauding bear which instantly makes working retail 500% better.

@celeart

FYCKDJFJDJDN perfect for overthrowing the patriarchy

Anonymous asked: Steve Jobs is eating my grandmas pussy in hell
Supergiant Owns My Gay Ass
answered:

hm. wish you didn’t send this

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You need to watch this, basically almost all nursing homes here in Portugal are doing the bottle flip challenge and it’s the best thing ever. Here’s one of the videos

the only acceptable dabs

(via chickenstab)

No offense but I need to be fucked rn

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i know everyone just heard ‘adam birkholtz has sisters’ and ran with the little sister headcanons and i love them all but also what if adam birkholtz was the baby of the family???? hmmm???

(thanks @kantperson and @tictacbergerac for letting me rant abt this on twitter)

LEAH, age 32, surgical resident

  • bc she’s so much older than holster she’s like a really weird sister/aunt/mom hybrid and adam LOVES HER. 
    • simultaneously So Cool and A Giant Nerd
    • saw holster’s snaps of getting high watching the golden girls and was like “ADAM >:(&rd quo;
    • adam: “LEAH U BOUGHT ME MY FIRST BOWL CHILL”
  • their parents are real :/// because leah never really dated and she ~should be thinking of settling down~ and then the other birkholtz children will be like: “hey ur kid is literally a brain surgeon could u maybe not??”
    • (leah is gay? maybe? but she’s focusing on her career and can’t really be fucked abt it tbh)
  • (leah’s siblings watch A LOT of grey’s anatomy. they call her mcdreamy and she HATES it and they will NEVER KNOW that christina yang made her decide to go to med school)
  • leah hears adam’s stories about ‘his bro ransom’ and just kind of sideeyes her phone.
    • “adam. adam honey. that’s gay”
    • “YOU’RE GAY”
    • “uh.”
    • “my friend shitty says i gotta let u come out at your own pace but is there somethin u wanna tell me?”

DELIA, age 29, resident nurse

  • she and leah are best fucking friends ever
    • (delia is the only one who knows abt leah’s monster crush on christina yang and she knows this bc they watched her last episode together and cried)
    • they work at the same hospital. the patients love them but they get REALLY CONFUSED bc someone will tell them “dr. birkholtz” is gonna treat them and they’ll be like “wait u mean delia? she was just in here she brought me this afghan?”
  • delia crochets like a motherfucking boss. she makes sweaters appear the way bitty cranks out pies. eric bittle, from GEORGIA, thanks god every day for delia’s blankets that are just everywhere in the haus
    • holster just casually gives people his scarf/hat and will be like “keep it dude. i have five more at home and i’m expecting a care package next month”
  • d elia has been dating the same guy since high school and they’re engaged. holster gave this dude the shovel speech ten years ago. he still had fucking braces and delia can’t wait for leah to tell the story at the wedding.
  • holster and delia aren’t actually that close but they have an unspoken ‘i would absolutely die for you’ bond.
    • when holster’s home, they watch bad sitcoms together. specifically, ones cancelled in their first or second seasons. they compare notes re: whether or not they deserved to be canceled and how they might have been saved

MURIEL, age 26, personal trainer and professional hockey

  • muriel and holster are tight. it’s 50% a being-the-closest-in-age thing and 50% a diehard bond of hockey love.
  • the family joke is that it’s a good thing holster’s a boy bc obviously their parents were scraping the bottom of the barrel of girls’ names
    • (ins ert trans holster hc here)
  • muriel took ice skating lessons from ages 4-6, and when holster turned 4 and started learning baby hockey basics, muriel defected
    • muriel is a goalie. muriel is six feet tall and 190 pounds. muriel could end your life and you would thank her.
  • she left for college the same year holster left home to play in juniors. it was fucking awful and she transferred her sophomore year to be closer to his billet family.
  • she may or may not be a Jack Zimmermann Puck Bunny tm
    • (when holster told her abt samwell, she was like !!!!!!!. holster was NOT HAPPY.)
    • she helped him move into the haus and met jack for the first time and her entire brain stopped working.
    • literally she was carrying a giant tub of holster’s whey protein and she just. stood there staring at jack. like a NERD.
    • “UM???? HI. CAN YO U PLEASE. COULD YOU SIGN. UM…. COULD YOU SIGN THIS PROTEIN POWDER PLS I WILL BUY ADAM MORE LATER”
    • holster and shitty were there. a smh tradition was born.
  • MURIEL PLAYS FOR THE BOSTON PRIDE OKAY?????
    • her teammates call her murray because they love her
    • shitty has season tickets. he skypes holster from every single game. they cry a lot.
  • after she won the isobel cup she brought it down to samwell and was like ‘,:) are u intimidated gentlemen?
    • (she immediately became a fucking nerd again bc jack was there and asked for her autograph)
    • “MURIEL SIGN MY ARMPIT!!!!”
    • “ADAM STFU”
    • “PLSEAS??? I’LL SHAVE!!!!!”
    • “ADAM I H9 U”

ADAM, age 24, econ student

  • has really fucking awesome sisters
  • is the undisputed spoiled brat baby of the family

(via loofahlover)

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